Heather Resnick
Survivor
Some people collect reward points
And travel to exotic places,
Unfortunately I collect cancer points
And see too many hospital faces.
Recently,
It was told to me
“It is cancer again”.
This was number 3!
It was like
A dagger to my heart.
I thought that I
Would break apart.
I was terrified,
Angry and sad,
I had to muster
All the strength I had.
10 years had passed
Since my last bout.
I prayed, “I beat it”
I denied any doubt.
But cancer can be
A wily thing.
There is always a chance
Of it reoccurring.
Number 1 was
12 years ago.
It was a life lesson
That helped me grow.
I was given the option
To remove my breast,
But the prognosis was great,
So I hoped for the best.
“Ductal insitu
Margins clear
No need to check lymph nodes,
So have no fear.”
“Lumpectomy, radiation
Is all you need
Then your life
Can positively proceed.”
2 years later
Under my arm
A small rash emerged.
Will this cause me harm?
No one seemed
Alarmed by this
But in my heart
It was cancer missed.
Shortly after
The lump appeared
It was cancerous,
As I had feared.
They removed my lymph nodes,
Then poisoned me.
It took more than a year
For my recovery.
Cancer liberated my dream
In spite of it all
To be a writer
Helping others stand tall.
Still, I became a lab rat
For every test,
I wanted no surprises
In my breast.
Tri monthly Ultrasounds, Blood work,
Manual exams, Urinalysis too,
Yearly Mammograms, Thermographies
I was checked through and through.
I hoped that I
Would never find
Cancer again, but if I did,
it would be caught in time.
With all this testing
That I did bear
It was the dreaded mammogram
That revealed my newest scare.
Invasive Ductal Carcinoma
So how did it happen
That I got this result,
Considering I monitor myself
To a fault.
I am not a genetic carrier,
But it must be my fate,
To be imbedded with cancer
Which I have now come to hate.
I have just lost
More bits of me.
Other treatments to follow
And then I will see.
I could scream and cry
“Oh Woe is Me”
But how would that help
To set me free?
A warrior I’ve become
So I can survive
To contribute to the world
And know I am alive.
So how do I cope
With endless fear?
Empowerment is where
I tend to veer.
I advocate
For what I need.
‘Knowledge is power’
Has become my creed.
Specifically this is
What I do
To help me
Make it through.
Laughter Yoga
Great medicine indeed,
Interesting books
That I like to read.
Listening to music,
Taking deep breathes,
Exercising daily
To relieve the stress.
Learning about
This notorious disease,
So I can make decisions
As I please.
Knowing when,
I feel anxious inside
Then I meditate
And make it subside.
Watching movies, napping,
Having fun with friends,
These are all important
Means to an end.
Getting up
Every day
And believing
I’m in a better way.
Being grateful
For the gifts of life
Trying to live
With less strife.
It isn’t always easy,
I sometimes cry,
But I am human.
I can only try.
I have a life purpose
I must fulfill,
It is reason enough
To keep my will.
It is a natural response
For us to fear,
But staying to long
Causes depression to rear.
Those who support us
Can only cope
When we are strong
And we have hope.
I want to teach my children
To be resourceful and strong,
And that there is always
Someone, something to help them along.
Knowing yourself
Is a powerful tool,
It helps to deploy
This Golden Rule:
‘Life is for living,
So do what you can
To deal with the card
That is in your hand’.
For others are watching
Who need inspiration
As a warrior with foresight
You will set the foundation.
And then we can hope
We can pray
That maybe
One day
Cancer will stay away.