My name is Ashley. I am 31 and I received my breast cancer diagnosis in April. I was just shy of 19 years cancer free from a childhood cancer called Ewing Sarcoma. A cancer that robbed me not only of a normal childhood, but also of my left foot. Now, nearly 20 years later, to say that this diagnosis came as a shock would be an understatement. I never expected that at age 31 I would be battling for a second time. I underwent a double mastectomy on May 31st and just completed my 6th round of chemo on November 31. I am now still faced with completing Her2 hormone blocker Infusions until July of next year, another surgery for the permanent implants and about 6 weeks of daily radiation. I am half way through the battle and I am amazed I’ve come this far. If you asked me back in April upon receiving this life changing, world shattering, devastating news if I would have made it this far and be where I am, I would have said no. I felt defeated, cheated and punished. Why me? Why AGAIN? How come I am the chosen one in my family to have to get in the ring and lace up my gloves for yet another long round? It still doesn’t quite make sense to me however I am changing my attitude and perspective. Every day is different and I wish I could say I am positive Patty every day of the week ending in “Y” but I would be lying. Some days it is a struggle just to get out of bed, but I push myself and face the day regardless of how hopeless and despairing it seems. I find that helping someone else always seems to get me to a good place and gets me out of my own turmoil and sometimes seemingly endless day of doctors visits or treatment or pharmacy runs to refill the various medications, all of which revolve around the life sucking, earth and world shattering, killer called Cancer. I have to continue to remain steadfast, stubborn and feisty so that I can continue to gain the energy I need to fight this disease, and I WILL conquer once again. I am already a survivor so this beast has no idea what it is up against. I will fight and I will win, again! The final score WILL be Ashley-2 / Cancer -ZERO! This I am confident of. There are so many ups and downs and roller coaster twists and turns, not only emotionally, physically and mentally but also financially. The stable ground you once may have stood on has crumbled beneath you and the quick sand just tries to pull you down, deeper and deeper in the hole. Don’t get me wrong, this HAS put me into some serious financial hardships, relationship hardships and self esteem hardships, to say the least. On the flip side, the supper I’ve received is unlike anything I could have predicted or asked for. It only motivates me to continue lending a hand to the newly diagnosed woman or even just the homeless man or woman on the street. I plan on continuing on this mission of offering hope and inspiration long after I am in remission and I hope I find my purpose for this battle once again is because I am the lucky, chosen individual that can help spread the unrelenting hope and inspiration to anyone battling, especially the newly diagnosed. My story can and will continue to provide a regained hope and strength that otherwise wouldn’t be received if offered by a person who has not been through this, because as much as our families, loved ones, supports wish they could TRULY understand, you simply cannot unless you have walked it. I have walked, crawled and hopped it.