John Scoblick’s daughter, Melissa Estes, died of metastatic breast cancer (MBC) in 2019. Today, he honors her legacy of breast cancer advocacy by serving as an advocate for Susan G. Komen and Market Board member in Central Texas. Through fundraising, public speaking and legislative advocacy, he hopes to make progress toward a future where no father has to lose a child to breast cancer. This is his story in his own words.
Melissa’s Breast Cancer Journey: It Started with a Lump
Melissa was a fighter. When a radiologist told her she shouldn’t worry about the lump she had found, Melissa saw another doctor, who agreed with the radiologist. She was just 32, but she had a gut feeling something was wrong and pushed for a biopsy. That’s when she was first diagnosed with breast cancer.
Refusing to Back Down During Treatment
Melissa worked as a counselor, and for a time, helped breast cancer patients and their families navigate the emotions that a diagnosis brings.
She fundraised for breast cancer events, and she was so committed to her profession that she refused to cancel a speech she was scheduled to make at a luncheon for a local breast cancer organization.
The event was scheduled three days after her mastectomy. She was given the opportunity to back out, but she refused.
The day of the luncheon, I picked her up and drove her, drain tubes and all, so she could make her speech. After multiple standing ovations, there was not a dry eye in the house.
Staying Strong After Her Metastatic Breast Cancer Diagnosis
In addition to the mastectomy, she underwent six months of chemotherapy and six weeks of radiation. For a year, her scans showed no evidence of disease. But after experiencing persistent back pain while moving furniture, further tests revealed the cancer was back and had metastasized (spread) to her spine.
She stayed so strong and motivated throughout her final year. I remember being in the recovery room with her following her liver biopsy. She got a call on her cell phone. She said, “I have to take this.” It was a client. She was on the phone for what seemed like forever, and she never once let on what she was going through. She was just incredible.
Determination to Finish What She Started
Even as she navigated her MBC diagnosis, Melissa remained dedicated to her goals. She continued working toward earning her doctorate in psychology – a reflection of her unwavering commitment to helping others.
She completed her studies shortly before she passed away on Nov. 21, 2019. Three years later, I had the honor of accepting her degree on her behalf.
After the ceremony, we learned her dissertation focused on managing fear after receiving a breast cancer diagnosis. Even in her final days, Melissa was still working to support others facing the disease.
Honoring Melissa’s Memory at the Komen 3-Day
A year after Melissa passed away from breast cancer, I began looking for some way to connect with her legacy.
This was right in the middle of COVID, and all events in my area had been canceled. But there was one – the Komen 3-Day in San Diego – that was still scheduled to go on, and the first day of the walk fell on the first anniversary of her passing. I registered, and it seemed like within the hour I got the call that the event was postponed to 2021. But as it turns out, the Closing Ceremony for the 2021 3-Day would fall on the second anniversary.
My initial plans were to walk as an individual and get lost in the sea of participants. However, a colleague in California invited me to join her team and I agreed.
I had the privilege of sharing Melissa’s story and her drive to find the cures to end breast cancer. It was an incredible experience that led me to even greater opportunities to serve in Melissa’s place as a breast cancer advocate.
Fundraising and Building Connections in Melissa’s Name
I’m a Komen Market Board member in Central Texas and have participated in legislative advocacy events. I even had the privilege to share Melissa’s story on Komen’s Real Pink Podcast.
I’ve never been comfortable with fundraising; asking people for money is just not in my DNA. But when I first shared Melissa’s story, I was overwhelmed by the response. It’s not fundraising in the traditional sense.
I’m a conduit for Melissa’s breast cancer legacy, and people are donating because of her. My involvement with the 3-Day and MORE THAN PINK Walk has taught me that you never know what’s going to connect with someone.
We’re all just one degree of separation away from knowing someone – a friend, family member or colleague – who has been impacted by breast cancer. You’ve just got to put it out there.
Continuing Her Legacy One Step at a Time
Her work isn’t done, but I’m doing my part to help end breast cancer. I think Melissa would be proud of what we’ve been able to accomplish. I witnessed her passion and dedication to the fight against breast cancer and how she held up through everything she endured. It can never take the pain of losing her away, but it does give me peace.
Statements and opinions expressed are that of the individual and do not express the views or opinions of Susan G. Komen. This information is being provided for educational purposes only and is not to be construed as medical advice. Persons with breast cancer should consult their healthcare provider with specific questions or concerns about their treatment.
